


oh, every time you cross my mind, I get stupid

by aliceinacoma



Category: Superstore (TV)
Genre: amy and jonah work through shit, post-season 3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-29
Updated: 2019-05-04
Packaged: 2020-02-09 12:41:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18638329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aliceinacoma/pseuds/aliceinacoma
Summary: Dear god, she thought, was it legal for anyone to kiss like that? Like his mouth was created to fit perfectly against hers, like no one else had ever really kissed her properly until now?--Or, Jonah and Amy in the aftermath of their accidental sex-tape.





	1. I just want you to touch me

**Author's Note:**

> Title is from LEON's "Surround Me."

“Oh my god,” Amy said into the ceiling of the Photo Lab. Her skin tingled where Jonah’s labored breath puffed out on the juncture of her neck and collarbone. She was acutely aware of him still inside of her, his hips sweaty against hers, his left hand cupping her face gently. His thumb brushed back and forth along her cheek, and for once Amy couldn’t find it in herself to flinch away from the tenderness.

 

“ _Oh_ my god,” Jonah echoed, still catching his breath. When he lifted his head to catch her eye, his lips were swollen from kissing, hair in total disarray. A small hickey the size of a thumbprint was already taking shape just under his jaw. Amy felt a possessive kind of desire swell in her gut because, well, _she did that_.

 

That thought somehow broke her. It was just so ridiculous because, after all, this was _Jonah_ , stupid, tight-pants-wearing, NPR-listening Jonah, who had just fucked her - and, yeah, she was choosing her words carefully - in the Photo Lab like a starved man.

 

Was it absolutely insane that she was already thinking about when they could do it again?

 

She breathed out an incredulous laugh, and Jonah joined her in earnest, giddy in that post-sex haze.

 

“We should probably…” she murmured.

 

Jonah nodded, but he leaned down for another kiss anyway, his left hand tightening in her hair. _Dear god_ , she thought, _is it legal for anyone to kiss like that?_ Like his mouth was created to fit perfectly against hers, like no one else had ever really kissed her properly until now?

 

She pulled away, running her fingers along his hairline. “Jonah,” she said, and it really wasn’t her fault if she didn’t sound as stern as she had intended.

 

“Right,” he said, smiling softly.

 

Placing one soft kiss on her neck, he carefully extracted himself, rolling over and off the counter to pick up their clothes and clean himself up. She sat up and followed suit, looking around for her panties, but they seemed to have disappeared in the chaos. She pulled her shirt on before jumping down from the counter, hoping it would cover her a bit more, but she still felt too exposed for the way Jonah gazed at her as he buttoned up his shirt.

 

“Um,” she said, “have you seen my…?”

 

He finally broke eye contact with her to glance around the room, spotting her underwear and pants in a ball in the corner. They both went for it at the same time, hands brushing as they reach down to pick up the discarded items. An almost electric shock hit them both, and Amy blushed at the wild pace of her heart.

 

They  _just_ had sex. Why should any of this make her nervous?

 

It wasn’t really nerves, though, and in the next instant, Jonah pulled her back into him to kiss her vigorously. She dropped her pants back to the floor, wrapping her arms around his waist to pull him closer, her fingers grazing the skin just underneath his shirt.

 

Jonah whimpered at the contact, jarring Amy out of her dizzy haze. Breaking this kiss, she said, “Um, we probably shouldn’t…”

 

Jonah laughed, nodding and letting his hands drop from her face. “Right.”

 

“I mean, people are probably wondering where we are,” she added. “And we know what happens when we let their imaginations run wild.”

 

“Nothing good,” Jonah agreed, tucking in his shirt as she pulled back on her underwear and pants. Her shoes ended up in two opposite corners, though she couldn’t remember how. Not that she could remember much, beyond the sensation of Jonah’s tongue in her mouth and his…

 

Well, you know.

 

Pants, shirt, and shoes all in order, she ran her fingers through her hair, though she was certain it was a hopeless case. She did a spin for Jonah, who, she noted, had been staring at her fondly the entire time.

 

“How do I look?” she asked. His smile only grew wider.

 

“Perfect,” he told her.

 

Amy rolled her eyes. “I’ll take your word for it,” she muttered sarcastically. Squaring her shoulders, she held open the door to the Photo Lab for him. “Ready?”

 

Neither of them anticipated the thunderous applause that greeted them as they walked out into the hall. They stopped short at the sight of their co-workers gathered together in a giddy huddle, wolf-whistling and call out things like, “Get it!” and “Damn gurrrrl!”

 

Jonah leaned down toward Garrett, lingering nearest to them.“Uh, what’s going on?” he said.

 

Garrett smiled tightly. “Oh, people all over the world just saw y’all have sex. So. Congrats.”

 

Alarmed, Jonah looked up at Amy, who covered her face with her hands.

 

“Things have a way of working out, huh?” she asked.

 

—

 

Glenn had it out with them in his office for about thirty minutes before sending them home with the promise that they’ll “have to talk about this tomorrow.” Of course, Glenn “having it out” with anyone basically meant him wringing his hands and saying, “I don’t want you to get in trouble,” so it wasn’t really that bad.

 

The perk of being lectured by Glenn was that most everybody else had left by the time they both headed out to the parking lot, so the catcalls and wildly inappropriate questions were kept to a minimum. Small mercies, Jonah supposed.

 

“I could really use a drink,” Amy said as they reached her car. “Or a cigarette. Both.”

 

“I can’t imagine why,” Jonah responded. “This is just a typical Wednesday for me.”

 

“You have internationally-streamed sex every Wednesday?”

 

“You don’t?”

 

“Can’t say I do.”

 

“Well, you’re missing out.”

 

Amy laughed. “We’re totally gonna get fired, aren’t we?” she asked. Jonah shrugged.

 

“It’s…definitely a possibility,” he said. Running a hand through his hair in that nervous tick of his, he added, “Um, sorry about that.”

 

“What?” Amy asked, frowning. “Why are you apologizing?”

 

“Because I kind of started it, when I kissed you,” he said. Amy shook her head.

 

“Hey, come on, we were equal participants here,” she insisted. “I mean, if anything I escalated things by shoving you into the printer.”

 

Jonah stared off just above her head, as if replaying the moment in his mind. “Yeah, that was pretty hot,” he admitted. Amy rolled her eyes, grinning ruefully as she leaned back against her car to gaze up at the stars twinkling away above their heads.

 

“At least the sex was good,” she admitted, partially because it was the truth and partially because Jonah’s blush really did something for her.

 

“Yeah,” he said, locking eyes with her. A charged moment passed between them as they leaned side-by-side up against her car. It occurred to Amy then that this was a moment that needed careful consideration.

 

After all, where they hell were they supposed to go from here?

 

They broke the silence at the same time, speaking simultaneously.

 

“We should probably talk - “ Jonah started. 

“Do you want to do it again?” she asked, fighting hard against the flush in her face as she processed his words. Of course Jonah wanted to talk; the boy did more talking than anyone else she’d ever met in her entire life. It was by far his most irritating quality.

 

It did not, however, curb her desire in the slightest, so there was that.

 

“Can we not have that conversation right now?” she asked, rubbing that space at the top of her nose. “I mean, you’re right, we should. But maybe we could just pretend none of this happened for a bit? Not,” she adds quickly at the alarm on his face, “the sex. Just the part where everybody saw it and we might lose our jobs.”

 

“What are you suggesting, Sosa?” Jonah asked with a smirk.

 

“Emma’s not home tonight,” Amy said, feigning innocence.

 

“Oh, so you’re lonely,” Jonah said, nodding. “You just want somebody to watch America’s Next Top Model with.”

 

Amy glared at him, opening her car door and scrambling in before he could continue the bit. She rolled down her window. “Keep up the joke if you want to be uninvited,” she warned him.

 

“You would never,” he said, a mocking hand over his heart.

 

“You think you’re the only person who’ll have sex with me? Ha!” she said with a laugh. “I can have my pick of suitors, believe me.”

 

“But where would you get this kind of unbeatable tete-a-tete?” Jonah asked as she put the car into drive.

 

“I can’t believe I just had sex with you,” she said, before driving off into the night, leaving Jonah grinning after her.


	2. don't over think it, just finish up your drink

They never talked about it.

 

Not that Amy hadn’t meant to. She had. She’d wanted to even, sort of, in that way you want to go to the dentist: if you put it off long enough, it just becomes more painful than it’s worth, so might as well get it over with as soon as possible. So yeah. The I Have Feelings for Jonah conversation was like going to the dentist. Or something.

 

But the thing is, they just kept finding more pressing things to do with their time.

 

Mostly having sex.

 

To his credit, Jonah did  _try_ to have the conversation. He always came over to her house with the utmost intention of sitting down and hashing out precisely what it was they were doing here. That was the adult thing to do, right?

 

And yes, it was probably Amy who ruined it. She’d press her leg up against his or put a hand on his arm or just straight up jump him as soon as he walked in the door and, honestly? They were both goners.

 

On day 37 of this, Jonah didn’t even bother trying to talk first. They’d gone out to see a movie - he’d finally convinced her to go see “Hereditary” with him, which was a mistake because she was stone-cold the whole time while he was losing his mind - and as soon they got back to her house, he threw himself onto the couch and pulled her in close for a kiss.

 

The make-out had just escalated to his hand sliding half-way up her shirt when Amy pulled back, frowning.

 

“What are you doing?” she demanded.

 

Jonah froze. “Uh…making out? Why, what are you doing?” he asked.

 

Amy shook her head. “No, I mean, what, you aren’t gonna try to like, make us have The Conversation?”

 

“Uh, I mean, it just seemed like you didn’t want to?” he said uncertainly. “I figured I might as well hedge my bets and stop asking.”

 

Amy pushed him away, her frown turning into a full-on glare. “Of course I want to have The Conversation!” she snapped.

 

Jonah threw his hands up. “Okay, well, it’s just, every time we try you’re, like, all up on me, and then we just have sex and never talk about it.”

 

“If you want to stop having sex, Jonah, we can,” Amy said.

 

“What? No! I don’t want that!” he said, alarmed. “Okay, fine, let’s talk then!”

 

“Let’s do it!” she said, then paused, looking at him expectantly as if waiting for him to make the first move.

 

“Hey,” Jonah said, “you’re the one who wants to talk - go right ahead!”

 

Amy rolled her eyes. “Oh, come on, Jonah, don’t be such a baby about this - “

 

“I’M the baby?”

 

“Duh! You’ve been begging to have this conversations, and now you won’t. Is somebody scared? Is baby Jonah scared?”

 

“Looks like somebody’s projecting.”

 

“Projecting? Ha! You just can’t handle how ridiculous you are!”

 

“Me?! You’re the ridiculous one!”

 

“Am not!”

 

“Are too!”

 

And that’s how they ended up having sex on her couch and not talking at all.

 

—

 

The thing she’d always hated about St. Louis is that, for a place that was technically a city, it had the worst small town vibes ever. It was almost impossible to walk out the door without running into someone you knew - and it was never the person you _wanted_  to run in to.

 

This time it’s Renee, meandering through the rows of the Tower Grove Farmer’s Market that Jonah finally forced her to check out. She could admit it was kind of nice, all the fresh air, the customers who didn’t need anything from her. Never mind that they couldn’t actually afford to buy any of the overpriced, hipster vegetables.

 

Amy and Jonah were giggling over a potato that bizarrely resembled Glenn. Holding it up, Amy did her best impression of their manager as Jonah asked increasingly odd questions when she heard an all-too-familiar, “Amy?” behind her.

 

Sure enough, when she turned around, there was Renee in all her glory. U-City had actually been a pretty diverse high school to attend; it wasn’t like she was the only brown kid walking around, but somehow she had still managed to gravitate toward the most basic white girl she could find.

 

Unsurprisingly, that basic white girl had turned into an even more basic white woman, decked out in Lululemon yoga pants and big sunglasses.

 

If she weren’t so taken aback, Amy might have laughed.

 

“Renee!” she said with as much excitement as she could muster.

 

“I thought that was you,” Renee said cheerfully. “Bring it in, girl, how are you?”

 

“Sooo good,” Amy said as she reluctantly leaned in to return Renee’s hug.

 

“It’s so good to see you. I mean it’s been, what, like years right?”

 

“Just a few.”

 

“How are you? Tell me everything!” Renee said, but before Amy could even consider where to begin, she was gushing, “How’s Adam? God, I was always so jealous he was the guy you ended up with. Is he still as hot now as he was in high school?”

 

Behind her, she heard Jonah coughed out an awkward laugh, and she smiled tightly at Renee. “He’s…fine. We actually split up about a year ago.”

 

Renee covered her heart with her hand, as if Amy had just said Adam had died rather than simply divorcing her. “Oh my god, Amy, I am so sorry! That’s terrible. Really, I just was not expecting that.”

 

“Yeah, well, neither were we,” Amy offered half-heartedly. In the brief, awkward silence that followed, Renee finally seemed to notice Jonah standing a foot or so behind Amy and looked him up and down with interest. Amy’s palms started to sweat.

 

“Oh, who’s this?” Renee asked. She raised a teasing eyebrow at Amy. “Moving on rather quick, aren’t we, Amy?”

 

“This is Jonah,” Amy said quickly. “We, uh, we work together. Jonah, Renee. We went to high school together.”

 

“Jonah,” Renee said. Honey colored her voice in a way that made Amy’s skin crawl. “It’s so nice to meet you. So. What high school did you go to?”

 

“Oh, uh, no I’m actually not from St. Louis,” Jonah said, reaching offering his hand out for a handshake. Renee responded in kind, her hand lingering in Jonah’s for two seconds two long.

 

“Really, where are you from?” Renee asked, and suddenly it was like Amy had never existed. Typical Renee. Once a semi-attractive man was in the room, it was like no one else existed, especially not Amy.

 

“You know, Renee, it was nice to see you again, but I have to get going,” Amy said with a curt smile. “I’m sure we’ll run into each other again soon.”

 

Turning on her heel, she made a quick retreat around the corner toward the street where the car was parked. Behind her, she heard Jonah mutter a swift, “Uh, nice to meet you!” and scurry after her, calling her name as he struggled to keep her pace.

 

“What, you didn’t want to stay and chat her up?” Amy teased. Jonah rolled his eyes but offered no response. Amy frowned at him, grabbing his forearm.

 

“What?” she asked. “Are you okay?”

 

“I’m fine,” Jonah said.

 

Amy snorted. “Well that was convincing.”

 

Jonah stopped in his tracks, running a hand through his hair in frustration. “Can we not do this right now?”

 

“Do what?”

 

“Get into a fight in the middle of the park,” he said.

 

“Uh, I wasn’t aware we were about to get into a fight,” she responded. “What’s wrong?”

 

Jonah passed a hand over his eyes, resigned. “It’s just - do you always need to introduce me as a coworker? Like, I know we haven’t really established what this is but it’s clearly _something_ , so can you just at least admit that to yourself?”

 

Amy scoffed. “I know this is _something_. Obviously. I just don’t feel like everybody else needs to be in our business.”

 

Jonah laughed, but it was one of those harsh laughs Amy didn’t here from him very often. “Come on, Amy, you know that’s not what it is.”

 

“That IS what it is. I don’t want the dude at the gas station to think our relationship is his business - “

 

“Yeah, what was with that? I mean, you could have just corrected him, but instead you went into a five minute explanation of why we would never, ever be together. I mean, seriously, it just made everybody uncomfortable,” Jonah said. “I mean, is the idea of being with me really that terrible?”

 

“No!” Amy responded immediately. “Of course not.”

 

“Then what is it?”

 

“I- “ Amy started, but nothing she thought to say seemed adequate enough to smooth the worry line on Jonah’s forehead, and as strange as it seemed, that was all she cared about at the moment. It didn’t even both her that he was mad at her for something she thought was fairly valid, just that she wanted to ease his fears. “I’m sorry,” she said, finally.

 

Jonah sighed. “It’s fine,” he said, continuing the journey to the car. Amy hurried after him.

 

“If you want, I’ll go back and tell Renee everything. Just the whole thing, even the complicated parts,” she said brightly. Jonah shook his head.

 

“It’s okay,” he said, unsmiling. “I just want to go home.”

 

“Okay,” Amy said. “We could watch a movie or something.”

 

Jonah opened his car door but paused before climbing inside. “Uh, I actually think I just want to like, you know, go home. By myself.”

 

“Oh,” Amy said, stunned. “Um, yeah. Yeah, of course. No worries.”

 

The drive back to her house was silent. Jonah didn’t even put on a podcast, just stared out the front window in deep thought. It had been so long since they’d sat in awkward silence like this, it felt like she was having an out-of-body experience. All she wanted to do was reach out and touch him, just to anchor her, but she knew it was a bad idea. Angry Jonah wasn’t one to be comforted.

 

As they pulled up to her house, she gave him one last tight smile. “So, I guess I’ll see you later.”

 

“Yeah, of course,” he assured her. After an apprehensive pause, he reached over to kiss her lightly on the cheek. "I'll, uh, I'll call you."

 

"Okay."

 

Before sliding out of the car, she glanced back. “I - “

 

“I know,” Jonah said gently, and Amy nodded, stepping fully out of the car.

 

She stood on the sidewalk for longer than she needed, watching the length of the street down which his car had disappeared and cursed the fact that it suddenly felt like she was missing a limb.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tbc.
> 
> The thing that bugs me about Superstore is that I'm actually from St. Louis, and they don't do it right at all. So I tried to add some actual STL references in there. Especially "where did you go to high school?" It's like the first question anyone ever asks here. 
> 
> Hope y'all enjoy! I think the next chapter will be the last.


	3. the lights go down, i want you around me

The week following the disastrous farmer’s market adventure dragged on so sluggardly that Amy feared she was stuck in some time warp. It was her week with Emma, so there was no chance of Jonah coming over, but to make it worse, he didn’t call either like he had almost every other night they’d spent apart in the past month and a half.

 

Not that he didn’t check in with her. He texted her at least once a day, but it left her unsatisfied. And that, she thought, was the reason she’d been resistant to this for so long. Now that she knew what it was like to have Jonah around all the time, she couldn’t imagine how she was supposed to alone. It was that dependency that she dreaded in romantic relationships.

 

And now here she was, standing in the middle of the penguin exhibit at the zoo next to Emma, listening to her chatter away about how penguins mate for life.

 

‘Or they date you for a month and then take off when you get too difficult,’ Amy thought bitterly.

 

“The stand-up was really funny,” Emma was saying as Amy tuned back in.

 

“Huh?”

 

“The stand up. About the penguins,” Emma repeated slowly. “Did you not listen to me at all?”

 

Amy sighed, running a hand up Emma’s arm. “Sorry, honey. I’m just in my head. I’ll pay better attention.” They continued their walk through the penguin exhibit, passing into the gift shop and back out onto the main path.

 

“What do you wanna see next?” Amy said, forcing cheer into her voice. “Oooh, giraffes? You knew they’re your favorite!”

 

“Is it because of the baby?” Emma asked, seemingly out of no where. Amy stopped in her tracks and turned around cautiously to face her daughter.

 

“What?” she asked. She’d told Emma about the baby, naturally, but it was only fair if this fourteen-year-old was at least a little bit confused about why her mom and dad were having a baby together but still didn’t want to be married.

 

“Is that why you’re distracted?” Emma asked.

 

Amy shook her head. “No, honey. I mean, it’s…definitely a big deal, but I’ve had a kid before and she seemed to turn out okay, so I’m sure this one will be fine too.” Emma rolled her eyes but couldn’t help smiling at her mom. Then, tilting her head, she asked, “Is it because of Jonah?”

 

If Amy had been flustered before, she was practically drooling on herself now. She stammered, “Uh, Jonah? Why - why would you ask about him?”

 

Emma rolled her eyes again. “Come on, mom. I hear you talking to him on the phone, like, all the time.”

 

“It is not ‘all the time,’” Amy insisted, hands on her hips. Emma giggled.

 

“‘Oh, Jonah, you’re just so funny!’” she quipped, adopting a too-high voice that Amy assumed was a very bad impression of her. “‘You hang up first. No, you hang up first!’”

 

“I do not sound like that,” Amy insisted, smothering the laugh that built up in her chest. “And why are you listening to my phone calls?”

 

Emma shrugged, evading the question to walk the path once more. “So do you, like, like him?” she asked, wide eyes so innocently curious, Amy had to put an arm around her, as if she could capture this moment of purity by holding it still.

 

Then, deciding that honesty was the best policy here, she said, “Yes.”

 

“How much?”

 

“…a lot,” Amy answered begrudgingly. Emma smiled, mischievous.

 

“I knew it!” she declared in triumph. Amy barked out a laugh.

 

“Okay, Sherlock Holmes.”

 

“I’m just saying,” Emma said. “So if you like him, why are you upset? He doesn’t like you back?”

 

Amy shook her head. “No, he does.”

 

“So you’re dating?”

 

“Well…kind of.” At Emma’s confused frown, she added, “We sort of got into a fight.”

 

“Oh,” Emma said, biting her lip. “About what?”

 

Amy chuckled, running a hand through her daughter’s hair. “So many questions today.”

 

“I’m just trying to help,” Emma insisted, halting in the middle of the sidewalk. “It’s just…it seems like maybe Jonah makes you happy? You’re always really…relaxed when you get off the phone with him.”

 

Amy cupped Emma’s cheek tenderly. “Hey, he does make me happy.”

 

“Then I don’t understand what the problem is,” Emma said, crossing her arms over her chest.

 

Amy had no answer for that.

 

—

 

A month before Amy had found out she was pregnant with Emma, she was set to go to college. Big, fancy college too, or at least, fancy by her standards. Even now, when things were particularly mind-numbing at Cloud Nine, she liked to imagine how it would have felt to walk the halls of SLU’s campus, watch the ultimate frisbee team on the lawn, meeting with professors about her papers. It all sounded like such a luxury now.

 

But back then, as she prepped to go, this feeling grew in her chest like she was about to explode into a whole new person.

 

A person who, just maybe, didn’t need Adam anymore.

 

Of course, one stupid positive pregnancy test had turned all of that around, and suddenly she needed Adam more than ever.

 

Not that she regretted having Emma. Definitely not. And she didn’t regret marrying Adam, not really. There were, after all, at least a few good years they had together. It was just that sometimes she thought about that other girl, the girl who had all that opportunity laid out before her, the girl who still could have been a whole new person, if she wanted, who wouldn’t have married Adam or maybe not even had the baby, whose life wasn’t ever derailed by such choices.

 

There were times Amy wondered if she was still unwittingly derailing her life. Sleeping with Adam after they were broken up, staying at Cloud Nine, giving up on college classes. What was that old saying, “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”?

 

What exactly was she expecting?

 

Amy lay on her bed pondering that exact question when Jonah’s stupid face lit up her phone screen. She answered on the third ring, in a, granted misguided, attempt not to appear overly eager.

 

“Hey,” she said as casually as she could. Never mind the thundering sound of her heart in her ears.

 

“Hey,” Jonah chirped. “Whaaatcha up to?”

 

“Uh,” she said, scrambling for anything besides, ‘lying in bed trying not to think about how much it will suck if this doesn’t work out between us.’ “Just some errands,” she finished lamely.

 

“Cool,” Jonah said. “Well, do you maybe wanna come over? I kinda wanted to, um, talk.”

 

Amy’s breath caught in her throat. Nothing good ever came of “wanting to talk.”

 

“Or I can come over there, if you want,” Jonah said. “If that’s easier for you?”

 

Finally finding her voice, Amy croaked out, “No! No. It’s fine! I’ll, uh, I’ll be right over.”

 

“Okay, cool,” Jonah said. “I’ll, uh, I’ll see you soon.”

 

“Yeah,” Amy responded lamely. As soon as he had hung up, she threw herself off of her bed and dug around in her closet for anything that resembled an acceptable outfit. What was one supposed to wear to get dumped? Was it better to look fabulous or look so miserable that the dumper felt obligated to go easy on you?

 

In the end, she settled for jeans and t-shirt because who was she kidding? This was Jonah. There was no way he’d be an asshole about dumping her. He’d probably cook her dinner beforehand, just so she couldn’t really hate him when he said it was over.

 

And that made her mad as she drove down 170 towards his house. Not at him - well, okay, a little at him because he was an easy person to be irritated with - but at herself. Because she had so easily acquiesced to being invited over to a dude’s house just to get dumped. Where was her dignity? Where was her pride?

 

She supposed that all went out the window when you fell in love.

 

She nearly slammed on the breaks as the thought struck her. _Love?_  No. That wasn’t it. She wasn’t ‘in love’ with Jonah. She cared for him, sure. She liked spending time with him, duh. And yeah, she also really liked having sex with him. But if was too premature for her to be falling in love.

 

But she also really didn’t want him to dump her.

 

Not for her sake. Getting dumped she could take. It was only natural that a certain number of relationships would end in her life, and she could only be the one doing the dumping so many times. But to lose Jonah? And over what? Her shitty inhibitions about other people having comments about her personal life? Or worse, her sheer terror at finding something that might actually make her happy?

 

Was she really that much of a coward?

 

It was still fifteen minutes to Jonah’s house on google maps, but somehow she managed the drive in ten. After the sloppiest parallel parking job of her life, she practically jumped out of the car, racing up the steps to ring his doorbell repeatedly. Moments later, a surprised Jonah opened the door, but before he could even open his mouth in greeting, she brushed past him, talking at rapid speed.

 

“Okay,” she began in a rush. “Before you dump me, I just have to say: I’m sorry. Okay? I’m sorry that I can’t tell anyone that we’re dating. I’m - bad at this, in case you haven’t noticed. I mean, honestly, you could cut me some slack. The last time I really dated was in high school, okay, back when the rumor mill was a major player in people getting together - but that’s - that’s not the point. Wow, okay, I’m off track here.” She took a deep breath, looking Jonah straight in the eye. “I like you. A lot. So much that I don’t really know what to do anymore when you’re not around, which is just… And that terrifies me, okay? So before you break up with me, just…please don’t.”

 

There was a few seconds where Jonah said nothing, just stared at her, and then suddenly he was laughing, fully, a hearty laugh that threw her off balance. She crossed her arms, glaring at him.

 

“What?” she asked. “It’s not funny.”

 

“No, no,” Jonah said in between laughs, “it’s just…” He took a deep breath, calming himself, before looking down at her with a smile. “I was never going to dump you.”

 

Amy’s hands fell her to sides in surprise. “What?”

 

“I’m not going to dump you, Amy,” Jonah assured her. “Honestly, uh, at the risk of saying something that’s wildly premature for a six-week relationship, uh, my plan is to pretty much never break up with you.”

 

“Oh,” Amy murmured. A blush bloomed in Jonah’s cheeks.

 

“Yeah, sorry, that was probably -“

 

“No,” Amy interrupted him before he could take it back. “I - I get it.”

 

Jonah smiled, taking a step forward to tuck a strand of her hair behind her here. “For the record, I really like you too. More than you will probably ever understand. And I don’t mean like that stupid ‘soulmate’ bullshit. I mean like, when you’re not around, everything is just so boring.”

 

“Right?!” Amy gasped, grabbing hold of his hand where it settled on her cheek. “This week was the worst. All I wanted was for you to correct me on shit that doesn’t matter.”

 

Jonah laughed at that before pulling her in for one of those life-ending kind of kisses he seemed so fond of. It really wasn’t fair that he was so good at that, but, Amy supposed, at least she got to reap the benefits.

 

“Good talk,” she murmured when he broke the kiss and pulled him back in again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's all folks! Thanks for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> tbc


End file.
